Changing the lyrics to fit my needs

OPP, how can I explain it
I'll take you frame by frame it
To have y'all jumpin' shall we be signin' it
O is for Only, P is for Pee/Poop scratchin' temple
The last P...well...that's not so simple
It's sorta like another way to call an outhouse a toilet
It's five little letters that are missin', see it
You sit on it on occasion when you're doing all your trainin'
It seems I need to start the explainin'
Bust it

You know the feelin' when you really just gotta go
And so you sit right down but nothin' at all will flow
You run to potty and sit there but nothin' comes on out
Then you stand up and spray around just like a water spout
It could come from the F to the R to the O to the N to the T
And when that happens it's what we like to call pee pee
But then at times it comes out from the other side
And when that happens all you do is try to run and hide
You leave a "big ole mess" right there in your underwear
And at this point your screaming cause you just don't care

You down with OPP
Only Pee/Poop on the Potty
You down with OPP
No, not really
You down with OPP
Not necessarily
Who's down with OPP
Workin' on Brynne and Hadley

We pump you full of liquids and all the fiber we can
Starting this week we had ourselves a great idea and plan
This three day potty training thing is supposed to work
We follow you around, you might even say we lurk
We need to catch you before you go in you drawers
Because we know it will end up on our nice wood floors
Please little ladies I really wish you would get it down
So Mama's not stuck in the house and can go to town
We hope very soon you will be able to give us hints
Until then we only pray for strength, wisdom, and patience.

You down with OPP
Only Pee/Poop on the Potty
You down with OPP
No, not really
You down with OPP
Not necessarily
Who's down with OPP
Workin' on Brynne and Hadley

So far, potty training sucks.

New words and phrases

So the past few weeks have been incredibly busy.  Not just for me, but for the girls as well.  Here is a short sample of the new stuff they've been heard uttering around the house.

When they want a drink, they can no longer just say "milk" or "water".  Now, it's "Papa, may I have more milk/water/whatever please?".  After they ask, I inform them "yes you may", which Hadley repeats.  After saying this the other night, she gave me a bit of encouragement by saying "good talk".

It was a good talk, even though I really didn't add to the conversation.

Brynne informed me the "air conditioner is making funny noises", and then asked me to "please fix now".

I won't mention any names, but one of the little ladies was going to the bathroom.  I asked if she needed to be changed.  She then replied, "still working on it".  When she was done, she let me know it was a "big load". 

They've both started talking to me on the phone when I'm not there.  Every conversation is similar.  They say "hello", tell me "Papa go work", and then to "come back soon!".

On the weekends, I typically fix breakfast for everyone.  The night before, it is not uncommon for one of them to put in a request.  On Friday, Hadley wanted "pancakes" and Saturday, Brynne asked for "donuts".  Hadley was not disappointed to get regular and chocolate chip waffles.  Brynne was very pleased that I went and got donuts for us.  She kept asking to eat them in the "backseat", as we did the week prior while on a little father/daughters picnic, but I already had them dressed for church, so I didn't want to risk getting them dirty.

If you've been following me or Mama for any period of time, you know the girls don't watch TV at all.  When Mama left for the night last week, Brynne was overly distraught.  She told me "no" when I asked if playing with trains, trucks, letters, bouncy balls, puzzles, games, books, going to the basement, going outside, or playing with the dogs would make her feel better.  After 10 minutes I gave up and just asked her what would make her feel better.  She stopped crying, appeared to be deep in thought, and then replied "watch Winnie Pooh".


Winnie the Pooh truly makes all things better.

So we did.

Say what?

Our girls have never been Chatty Cathys.  They've more or less relied on sign language and pointing to get their point across.  Recently, there has been a bit of a change at our house.

One morning, as I got them out of bed, they said the usual "Papa, Papa".  The next morning, they were engaging me in conversation. 

They went from 15 words to 1,500 overnight it seemed.  How did that happen!  I haven't had my head buried in the sand, and I haven't been away from home. 

Here are a few of the conversations we've had, and an insight into what is was like just a week ago.

Me:  Hey Brynne, what do you think about breakfast for dinner?

The Brynne of old would nod her head in approval.

Brynne of now:  I like it!

Actually, we all love breakfast for dinner.   Who doesn't?

Me:  Hadley, can you tell your puppy dogs goodnight?

The Hadley of old would pant like a dog.

Hadley of now:  Good Win.  Nit Feee.

While getting in the car, no and tantrums have been replaced with "pak", as we head to the park.  Actually, they say this when we head anywhere - they REALLY love the park.

Going to church gets the response

"Abby, Gen, Toms"

clear references to her three friends Abby, Gwen and Thomas who will be there to play with them.

Throwing their hands in the air or pushing a plate off their tray, have been replaced with

"all done"

to signify the end of a meal.

We're not at the point where they can communicate everything they want, but I think we've made huge strides.  NO and tantrums still happen as there is still a certain level of frustration, but it's getting better.  Special kudos to Mama for all the work she does with them while I'm not around, and even when I am.

At least I can give up on trying to learn the signs they know.  Now, all I need is a translator or a toddler to english dictionary.

When God closes a door...

Hadley opens it.

A few months back I did a little extra child proofing by putting the door knob covers on all the doors we didn't want the girls opening.  It turned out to be a bit premature, so Mama took them off while I was at work one day. 

They ended up being more of a hassle to us than a preventative measure for the girls as they had yet to figure out the mechanics of the door knob.

That all changed the other day. 

It was just about bedtime and the girls were winding down.  After their bath, we put a hair band on each of them to keep the hair out of their eyes.  Hadley decided she was done with hers, and Brynne agreed shortly thereafter. 

I saw Hadley walking toward our bedroom.  She paused at the door, holding the two hairbands in her hand.  Brynne began dancing around so I turned to watch her.

A minute later I heard the bathroom door shut.  The master bathroom door, which is obviously off the master "suite", which can only be accessed by going through our bedroom.  I assumed the wind from an open window had closed it, but as I walked toward our room I noticed our door was open - wind doesn't open doors.

Hadley (while her sister created a diversion) had opened our door, opened the bathroom door, opened Mama's drawer in the bathroom, and returned the hairbands to their proper storage location in anticipation of using them again after the next bath.  She walked out as if nothing had happened, informing me that she was "all done".

The closing of the door, I believe, served three purposes.  First, we've taught them to pick up after themselves and always leave things/places nicer than they found them, which includes putting stuff away in the proper location.  Second, they have learned to always close doors.  Third, she was covering her tracks.

I guess it's about time to put the door covers back, but I have a dilemma.

If I reinstall them, Brynne won't have the opportunity to figure out how to open a door yet.  If I don't reinstall them, the odds are very high the girls will now have free reign to rooms that are not supposed to be accessible to them.

As I see it, I have three options: 

1 - Cover all door knobs to keep them in their quarantined area. 

2 - Cover no door knobs and give them unlimited access.

3 - Cover only those doors that lead to unsafe places so Brynne can work on opening the other one - which leads to the hall closet.

If I knew anything about blogger technology I would include a vote button here, but since I don't, all I can do is ask for your comments.  What do you think I should do?

PS - for those of you that are new to reading my writing rambling, the embedded links are three of my personal favorites from last summer and fall, which just happen to fit in here, I think.  Hope you hop over to them and read a bit of my "old" stuff.

Growth of a Baby Pictures

Kiddos change so quickly.  As I look back through the pictures we took I am so thankful we copied an idea a friend of ours had.  I can't say they were the originators of the idea, but I am still thankful they did it.

Here's the gist.  Take a picture of your children at certain points in their life next to an inanimate object.  By doing this, you'll be able to quickly see how they change over time.  For our friends it was a chair.  We decided to use their sock puppet monkeys.

Here's a quick photo album of the girls from birth through two years old. 

Newborns

Six months

One year

Two years

Linking with my lovely wife's weekly linky party, Mama Loves. Got a gadget, recipe, toy, book, craft your kid loves? Or have something that makes mama-ing (or papa-ing) a wee bit easier, or at least better? Blog about it and link up!

Torn

During the first six months of our girls' lives they didn't sleep well.  That's an understatement.  They cat napped at times during the day, and did basically the same at night.  Nobody in our house slept longer than an hour or two at a time with any consistency.

After visiting the baby whisperer (our nickname for the sleep specialist) we finally put the poor sleeping habits to bed.  Please forgive me for the pun.  I am a little slap happy after no sleep last night.  I thought it was punny, so I'm leaving it.

Our sleep specialist's name might have been Brooklyn.

I love it now that they sleep from 7 PM to after 7 AM every night/morning. 

I love it that they take a couple hour nap in the afternoon. 

I loved being home to get them up in the morning when they would wake before 7.

Yes, that is past tense.  They are sleeping in until after I leave now.  I rarely get to see all my girls in the morning before I head out to work. 

I miss walking into their room and hearing them excitedly say "Papa, Papa!". 

I miss scooping them up for hugs and kisses. 

I even miss changing them so Mama doesn't have to.

I've considered making a loud noise or just walking into their room to wake them up some mornings.  I don't do that as it would be incredibly selfish and unfair to everyone but me.  But I still think about it.

Not cool when Mama and kiddos are sleeping.

Is it wrong that I sometimes secretly wish they would wake up on their own early enough for me to greet them?

No means no...or does it?

We've all heard the statement "NO MEANS NO".  While it has a serious meaning, it has also become a punchline in many situations.  I contend it doesn't always hold true.  Here is my supporting argument.

Conversation from dinner the other night:

Me:  Hadley, do you want some more to eat?

Hadley:  No. 

Me:  Are you done eating?

Hadley:  No.

Me:  I'm confused.  Are you done eating or do you want something else?

Hadley:  No.

Me:  Is no the only thing you are going to say?

Hadley:  No.

Me:  Then are you going to say something else?

Hadley:  No.

Me:  I think we're done here.

Hadley:  No.

Me:  HEY!!!  How about a big girl bite of chicken?

Hadley:  Sure.

The point is this:  my girls have a limited vocabulary.  I think they don't completely mean to say no, but they can't yet say to me:

Dearest Papa, I would really enjoy a bite of chicken, dipped in BBQ sauce, followed by some sweet potato fries, dipped in BBQ sauce, and all washed down with a cold swig of milk.

Someday we'll get there.  Until that day comes, I'm stuck asking the same question eight different ways to try to find out what is really going on.

Professor Papa - Part 5

Sometimes, little ones learn more by watching than they do by hearing.  Here is an example.

I close doors.  The video is only 22 seconds, but it proves Brynne closes doors too.

Mostly, I do this to block off access to potentially dangerous parts of the house.  Our house is not a death trap for little ones, but a bathroom obviously poses more of a threat than the living room - as does a kitchen or any room with stairs.

The girls have picked up on this.  More often than not they will close doors behind them. 

Brynne is almost beside herself when we leave the bathroom after a bath.  She will close the door to the bathroom, then the door to our closet, and finish with the door to our bedroom. 

Most of the time she is closing the door to a room she has just left, but not always.  When getting ready for the bath she will close the door, shutting us all inside.  I assume it's to keep the heat in, but who knows for sure.

Doors in the house are not all that get closed. 

Refrigerator doors, car doors, hatches on the back of the car, baby/puppy gates, doors to the dog's houses, cabinets, entertainment centers, drawers - I think you get the picture.  If something can be shut, she will shut it.  Hadley will do the same, but she doesn't appear to be as OCD as Brynne is.

That's a good thing.  At least she won't ever be accused of being raised in a barn or trying to heat/air condition the whole neighborhood.

Along with the good comes the bad. 

I will confess that I almost always lock doors behind me.  When my in-laws sold their house they had to change the locks.  I don't know any reason why you wouldn't change the locks when you move into a new house anyway, but they had to do it as they were moving out. 

Why?  Because they couldn't find any of the keys. 

That blew me away. 

I don't purposefully leave the house and leave it unlocked, or my car for that matter. 

Brynne has taken up on that.  The only problem is she knows how to use the locks on our internal doors and might have locked herself in a room before.

Once the girls could reach the handles I made sure Mama knew how to unlock them from the outside.  She already knew it, but I just wanted to be sure. 

It came in handy the first time Brynne was knocking/banging on a door from the other side and Julia tried to twist a handle that wouldn't turn.

For now, the external door locks still are too hard to turn for them, but I'm sure the time is coming when they'll figure it out.

Guess I should have left those child proof things on the doors after I moved in instead of pitching them.

Professor Papa - Part 3

This is another instance of taking a good thing, and using it in the wrong fashion.

On vacation we had a bit of extra time to kill between bath and bed time.  Mama was tending to Brynne, so Hadley and I were playing in their room.  We were on the bed reading one of their sign language books.  I turned the page to the next sign, which was jump.

She then jumped.  Okay, so she didn't jump like this, but she clearly made the attempt.  With the extra spring in her step provided by the bed she was able to put some air between her feet and the bed. 

It caught me off guard.  I know that she knows the signs for the words in the books, but I didn't realize she knew what the words meant.  Granted, I was helping show her how to jump (as best I could from a kneeling position), but she took right to it.

She was laughing and smiling - obviously as proud of herself as I was. 

Brynne came in (attracted by the squealing of Hadley), climbed on the bed, and proceeded to do exactly the same thing.

The next day we worked on jumping off the ground.  Without the bed springs to supply some much needed lift they were only able to "jump" to their tip toes.  Since then they have been able to get a little lift, so I'm calling that success. 

In my opinion, even if you can barely put a sheet of paper between their feet and the ground it is still a jump.   Once we get a little basketball hoop for them we'll work on layups and dunking, but for now we'll stick with increasing their vertical.

I guess I am partly (or fully) to blame for their jumping on the wrong things.  I am the one who introduced them to jumping on the bed.  They, however, did start jumping on couches, chairs, and in cribs.

It's gotten to the point where if they are on the couch (where they know they are not to stand up) they will stand, jump, and then land/fall on their butts - laughing madly the whole time.

My two concerns are: 

1 - jumping over the back of the couch or off the sides/front

2 - landing on their butts from a jump on a hard surface.

The first one is higher on the danger scale than the second as they don't have as far to go, but it is still a concern.



Obviously it will be a long time before they do something which puts them way up on the danger scale, but even these small falls can do damage.



I'll just have to deal with it, though. Can't keep my girls in a bubble.

My, oh, my how they change

Two years ago

Last year

This year

Professor Papa - Part 2

Science has brought us so many new technologies and discoveries.  Most of the research, I imagine, is initially directed toward developing things that are beneficial to mankind.  Unfortunately, when a new invention comes out, there are always people looking to use it for other purposes.

The same can be said of stuff we teach our children.  Not that they are intentionally seeking devilish uses for their new found abilities, but it happens. 

No matter how good our intentions are, our children can easily use our lessons for evil instead of good. 

Here is one instance of that.

The good:  throwing a ball

From the first second the girls picked up a ball I was showing them how to throw it to me.  They didn't have the skill set yet to actually do that, but they tried.

Their earliest attempts to throw were just droppnig the ball.  If it landed on their toes and rolled to me I considered that a success.

Next, came the ability to drop a ball directionally.  All this means is they were dropping it, but moving one hand slightly to propel the ball one way or another.  Neither of us knew which direction that was, but it was done on purpose.

We then proceeded to do the two handed shove, which moved the ball with more velocity.

Finally, they were able to toss the ball.  Sometimes it went where they wanted and sometimes it went behind them - but they were throwing it. 

As we've continued to work on this they have increased the consistency with which they can get the ball to me.

If you're trying this at home, be sure to keep them at a safe distance.  Too often I have "caught" their throws (from two inches away) directly on the nose.  More often than not, when they do this they are running at me with their arm cocked back and don't decide to throw it until they are at a range where they can't possibly miss from.

Using a soft or inflatable ball helps avoid permanenet damage and/or scarring.

We've also made a game out of playing catch.  Sometimes they play catch with me.  Sometimes they play catch with nobody.  They just throw the ball and then scamper after it, giggling all the while.

How can playing catch be evil?  Keep reading.

The bad - throwing everything else

I didn't specifically teach them to grab a wooden block or a toy and chuck it.

I didn't throw the blocks and have them learn from my example.

Nevertheless, they have taken their ball throwing lesson and expanded upon it. 

They've also learned from their experimentation.  Here are some of their findings:

1 - small items fly farther than large ones

2 - small objects fly faster than larger ones

3 - large objects make more noise when they hit the wood floor

4 - large objects make sister cry louder and longer than small ones

5 - throwing an object can get it to places where toddlers can't fit, or aren't supposed to be

6 - Mama and Papa get confused looks on their faces when they find objects in locations they shouldn't be in

7 - Some objects are too heavy to be thrown

Throwing is not the only thing they've learned.  If you look back, one of the steps in learning to throw was the shove.  For those objects too heavy to throw, namely sister, they can be shoved in the direction you want them to move.

I have no plans to avoid teaching them basic survival skills - such as how NOT to throw like a girl.

I do plan to try and figure out what some evil uses might be, and then instruct them accordingly during the teaching phase. 

Vacation - Papa's point of view part 2

You’ll really need to read part 1 before jumping in here.

When we last left our story, I was just starting to plan our first ever family vacation, so that is where we'll jump back in.

January - I broke into Julia’s email to get Jane’s email address.  Once I had the address I lobbed the first test email to see if she was receptive.

She was.

February – I broached the idea of a vacation with Julia, and she shot it down; it was out of the question.

March – I tried again and the answer was the same.  I now decided that trying to suggest this each and every month would get us nowhere, so I let my plans simmer.

April and May – Nothing to report.

June – I throw caution to the wind since the girls were making great progress of their own and reached back out to Jane.  I was targeting a trip between August and February, so the girls would be under two years old and, therefore, could fly for free.  Jane was due with baby number three in October, so that limited us a bit.  John would be taking vacation in September, around their girls’ birthday, so we set that date.

July – I booked the flight, car, and hotels once Jane confirmed John’s vacation plans.  The only thing I told Julia was the trip would involve a two hour flight and a 90 minute car ride.  I also told her how much went into scheduling the flight, car, and hotel. 

You cannot book a flight for an infant on your lap over the internet.  You first have to book the flight and then call in with the other two riders.

For the car, you have to call the location to confirm they have car seats and can reserve them for you.

The hotel is a little trickier.  Unless you want to spend an arm and a leg to get a suite with two different rooms, you have to call around.  I couldn’t afford the suite, so I had to find a hotel with adjoining rooms.  Even if you do that, you have to find a hotel that can provide two pack n plays.

I distinctly remember one call where the person informed me they did have a pack n play.  I was in the middle of booking everything when I decided to ask a stupid question.  Did they have one crib or more than one?  In a hotel with 1,400 rooms they had only the one crib.  Click (that's me hanging up in disgust), on to the next.  The ninth hotel I called had what we needed so I booked it.

So everything is booked.  Julia has no idea where we're going or what we're doing.  Just to make sure she didn't figure it out by accident, I decided to throw her off the scent.  More on that to come next time. 

New to me

I've only bought two brand new cars in my life. 

The rest were used, but still new to me.  Just because someone else has already driven the car doesn't make it any less exciting, for me, the first time. 

Whether or not the clock has already been programmed by soemone else doesn't mean that I can't be just as excited when I figure it out - and then remember how to do it again when daylight savings hits. 

Since Julia gets to see the girls all day long, she gets to experience most everything they do for the first time in real time.  I either hear about it later, or see them doing it myself.  Those times I see them do something for the first time, I get so excited!  I yell to Julia to let her know what they are doing and typically get the response:

Yep, they started that a few days ago. 

At first that depressed me.  Actually, it depressed me for quite some time. 

I kept missing out on these milestones.  I think I might have been looking at these new actions as some sort of foolish competition. 

I was losing. 
Julia got to see everything.
I got to see nothing. 
I hate to lose. 

I don't know exactly when it happened, but at some point I just started thinking differently about it.  Instead of seeing it as a missed experience or as a loss, I decided to look at it as it truly was - still a new experience for me and the girls. 

Winning!


                                          "All I ever do is win" - Charlie Sheen


I still yell for Julia, just in case what they're doing is something new - and just to be sure what they are doing isn't some sign language I don't understand. 

But - I no longer feel bad that I didn't see it first.  Every so often I still see something for the first time and that is exciting. 

I've worked hard to teach them new things - things their mama probably doesn't really want me teaching them, but oh well.